Tag Archives: Maureen Brown

Remembering Maureen Brown – High Priestess of Wicca

Maureen Brown Wiccan High Priestess
Maureen Brown Wiccan High Priestess

Maureen Brown was a High Priestess of Wicca, and a qualified Counsellor, Psychotherapist, mother and grandmother- when she passed away into the arms of the veiled Isis, on this day, 11 years ago (25th December 2004). Since then Christmas day has never been the same.

I met her in the year 2000, at a Wiccan summer gathering of many covens, in a Glastonbury camping site. I didn’t know at the time that she had had surgery in her stomach and was recovering..  but she danced wildly with me in the barn that evening during the party / socials.. And later we spoke about magic and psychology and how she could help me with some of my issues (I didn;t tell her..she had just inferred!) It awed and impressed me so much..  She said to go and visit her in Croydon. I said I will.

But I did not.   I thought I could do it myself..  you know.. sort myself out.  I figured that if all else fails, I can always go to Maureen.  And a year or so passed – until I was Pan in an Open ritual, and at the end of it, 2 Witches – a man and a woman, waited to give me an invite to their coven ritual.. at Maureen’s biding ofcourse!

So I went a few days later, and thus began a great friendship, admiration, and learning. There’s much more of course ..but that can all wait for some future write up.

What was important was..  few years later, she was diagnosed with cancer..terminal..and we all gathered around, as she spent weeks ..nay months preparing..  not just her life..but all her students & friends  .. Well, she’s the psychologist, what else was she going to do?

And on the Christmas day, 2004, a fellow Wiccan Priestess Hazel and I went to the Hospice, and we just the two of us did a passing ceremony to aid Maureen who was already comatose.   And within hours, she passed away.  I ofcourse got home lit some candles..  and began to do some art work, titled, `passing of a Priestess’ – and after finishing the art, I called the Hospice, to hear the news that Maureen Brown has passed away..  just 15 minutes prior!

That Christmas time was special..  where few weeks prior, we had the most biggest party in her house, fire works, table for 30+ ..and passing her white wig around ..all of us taking photos ..making merry and light of what’s to come. It was one last glorious party she organised…for all of us!  (she’s a Counsellor..  she prepared us all well).

This morning I woke up all still ..feeling rather quiet..   possibly as we are just coming out of a cancerian full moon..  and over coffee, I looked on internet to find that apart from my blogs, and a PF document, no mention exists of Maureen Brown or her work..  How sad..  And what an honour.  And I’ve spent hours digging through my computer files, looking for photos, rituals, key dates..piecing dates together..(like the `Sea Priestess ritual Requiem’ that we Wiccans gathered to do at Brighton where Maureen’s ashes were scattered in the sea on an Autumn day in 2007!)

There is much more to say..so much more.

But for now..  I remember Maureen Brown, the Extraordinary High Priestess & friend who changed my life..  and empowered it.   As she often said, the work never ends.,  and some of us carry it on…even now!

Bright Blessings

-Mani Navasothy

The Womb-world goeth! (part1)

Will you take the Red Pill or the Blue Pill?  Yes there are other pills too ..but these matter!!  What am I talking about?   If you remember the film The Matrix, you’ll know what I am talking about!  In the early moments of their encounter, Morpheus was saying to Neo in The Matrix.. take one of them and forget the truth..and go back to the false dream-like reality.. Take the other, and you wake up to reality.. and can never go back! He takes the right pill.. (never mind the colour)..accepts reality..  his body is unplugged..and rejected..ejected.. from the Matrix of fantasies..   and his real life begins (in a mixture of suffocation, loss, pain, slime, and struggles!)

Birth is hard!!

Happy option - infinity (c) Mani navasothy 2013
Happy option – infinity (c) Mani navasothy 2013

Though we are all born, and have been living in the World, so many are stuck in many `womb-worlds’ – clogged and cluttered by needs, dependencies, having signed away their freedom in order to loyally support an ideal, a country, allegiance to a flag, a football team, a tribe, an organisation, a group, a relationships, and so many other things..  !

Within the womb, the unborn child is in a state of total safety and security, but also dependency.  It has it’s every need taken care of..  warmth, food..and even a playmate!  Yes, that placenta ..the twin ..the Soul-mate of the unborn.. ! (And don’t we then spend the rest of our lives searching for that lost soul-mate..  the `someone’ who is missing!!)

But the moment the baby is born..  through the pain and pressure of birth canal..  from dark..through tunnel to a world of  sudden blinding light.  the the safe womb-world is lost!  Soul-mate is gone..  It has to go from being a quasi-reptilian, amphibian to an air-breathing being.. and wait to be fed.  No tubes..no more.. No food and oxygen on tap.. through the umbilical cord. No ready-made warmth of the womb. ..and no mother’s heart-beat ..that steady drum that has been in your ear..and permeating trough your whole body non-stop for a whole 9 months…gone!   (that’s why drum beats always affect us!!)

And the tunnel of pain and birth..  ah..you look for that too!   The passage of rejection from womb-world..  You search for it.. and hope you find it at the end of your days… at death..  the tunnell..leading to light!   Your memories got screwed up..  you equate the moment of birth into world of light..  through the mother’s vulva, as life after death..

womb-world-goeth (c) Mani Navasothy 2014
womb-world-goeth (c) Mani Navasothy 2014

Having been thrown out of Eden (womb), the inner child…is always looking for the pearly gates of vulva..to heaven…back to the sacred womb…!

To be born is hard..  It means you have to be 100% self-sufficient..  No twin. No food in tubes.  You have to breath! You have to open your eyes now..and look at a world of Light and dark..not just the dark of the womb!  You can not float anymore in that secure slosh of amniotic fluid!  You have to stand up..and walk!  Let your spin and muscles support..  !!

It also means you are free..  to make your choices..  to walk your path…choose the roads you can travel..  choose your destinations!

Take the Option now..  to be born!

No one likes a cry-baby (except mothering types).  No one likes a winge-bag (except the gossip-mongers and rumour-millers).

Stop looking for death..your body is dying since the moment of your birth..  but new cells are always growing to replace the dead ones..   At some point, that balance will shift.. But long before that, Live!!

Well.. I still haven’t talked about Infinity, and the quantum realities that you can manipulate..

That’s for another blog post 🙂

Happy New You!

-Mani Navasothy

ps. Thanks to the late Maureen Brown, Wiccan High Priestess, Psychologist, Professional Counsellor, mother of 3, and grandmother, friend to hundreds, and rebel to many….for introducing me to Womb-world.

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Do men Cry in the Rain? (Male Mysteries)

The song goes “..One day when my crying’s done, am gonna wear a smile and walk in the Sun.. until then, I do my crying in the rain..”   Do you guys? And I am talking to guys..as in men.. (‘cos these days everyone calls everyone guys.. so it gets confusing).

The other day, I was in a particularly emotional state. and had broken down into a few tears .. in front of my mother and my sister..no less. Just for a few seconds,  mind you!  (well,I had ..by some personal miracle, been holding back the emotions for a good 2 hours as I traveled through the London Transport system at evening peak travel time.. without any tears showing in public!).   So you know what my mum said, as she patted my back briefly?   That men don’t cry.. Okay so she said that in a consoling tone..but that’s what she said.

Now I am a deeply sensitive guy (as in Man!) inside, and most of the time the best expression of emotions I have is anger..  and frustration.. I can give all sorts of psychology- but the truth of it is, it’s a habit learnt from my father (sadly). I had of course seen him cry in the past – either when he was drunk, or that one time..when he held me ( I was a 5 yr old boy) and while watching his father (my grandfather) die!!

Between then and now, I have shed tears..  in sympathy, empathy..or just because I am plain old upset or deeply sad.. about one thing or another.   (Some 4-5 months ago, when a select few people of a Pagan community were hell-bent on bullying and harassing me online..  I had had darker days..and only my partner saw me in moments of despair and tears).   But yes, most of the time.. 99% that is..  I hide…  either very late at night, quietly.. or out in the garden ..underneath my sacred Willow Tree ..(a weeping Willow is no good if one can’t actually weep under it sometimes…!)  And yes, I have stood out in the rain at times crying too..     The other great excuse  I’ve used to hide tears is…cold!  Yeah, just say you have a cold, and that’s why your eyes are watery..   Sniffle a few times, and blow your nose in a tissue in front people..or go as far as to act out a quick sneeze…and no one will guess!!

Going Forward

Seriously, leaving my personal trials and tribulations aside (and what’s the point of a personal blog if I can’t do the occasional revelation?)..  I got to thinking about all sorts of things.

Society: Male Mysteries
Society: Male Mysteries – emotional support and psychological explorations of well-being for men.

Firstly that if more men do express emotions, then for people like me, those suppressed emotions won’t surface as `anger’..  and the world will really be a better place.

Secondly, that if there are more groups, places or support – for men ..to help deal with our struggles, then much breakthrough can happen.  It’s not about some great big scheme, where men turn up and do communal crying… as some therapeutic act (though here may be serious merit in that too). No. It’s about a place..  physical or online, where without this social stigma that men can’t show emotions, ..we men can live emotionally enriched lives..  and face crisis and struggles better (instead face them with aggression – something I am known for doing!)

Male Mysteries – Esoteric & Magical Explorations 

Some 8-9 years ago, I was having weekly counselling .  No, not because there was something wrong.. I was studying Transpersonal Psychology, and training in Counselling Skills. So the course required me to be in counselling to deal with old stuff…and so much resolutions and wisdom came out of that.   The lady who helped me was the late Maureen Brown. And she often spoke of a deep lack of `Male mysteries’ in pagan, esoteric and spiritual communities… Or just in modern world…for all !   We got a little group going.. monthly.  But it did not progress. However, I took some of those ideas and started forming the pagan outdoor group `Hern’s Tribe’  – which was to be a Male Mysteries group.    That changed however, and became a unisex general outdoor shamanic group.    Some of the guys in Hern’s Tribe did how ever explored a few male mysteries in 3-4 outdoor special activities & ceremonies (ideas of fire, hunting etc). It was a private subgroup we called Obsidian Order (taken from the fact that Obsidian is a hardened glass-crystal that stone age man used to fashion sharp spear-heads or arrow tips).

Hern's Tribe: Male Mysteries
Hern’s Tribe: Male Mysteries – esoteric explorations

But recently I had been thinking about all that, and have been inspired (by Circumstances and just socially aware thinking)…to take those ideas forward.  Already I have set up a facebook group and a page  (Can you believe that? almost 1 Billion people on facebook, and no Male Mysteries group or page until yesterday!)  It’s just a seed…work in progress…but do look for it, and become a member or a fan..   I’ll of course promote it once it has taken shape.

I’ll close this blog post with one final though..  on tears again.   Very much all those ancient Egyptian statues and art works seem to have that specialised Eye-design.. and why does it always show a tear?  Tears of Isis? Tears of Ra? Tears ..why?

-Mani Navasothy

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And now for a personal statement on Astrology, transits and personal conflicts

As most know, I follow Jonathan Cainer – astrologer!

I began reading his daily forecasts in news paper about 15 yrs ago, back in my Home Office trolley pushing `Admin Assistant’ days.. I’ve grown to like his character and his witty, cryptic way of offering forecasts.  And I’ve studied his forecasts while looking at the transits from an Ephemeris on my own birth-chart, to work out (reverse engineer!) how  news paper sun-sign forecasts are done.. (Thank you Jonathan Cainer. I have given thanks to you in my new eBook `Astrology for Eclipse Magicians’ – kindle version 🙂

My own calculations and working out transits on my charts (I did that few months ago) indicated that my life is about to go through some intense phases..  There were 2-3 important factors..

Saturn moves out from my house of Creativity (which gave me hope that finally my creative lessons are learnt and I will start to make much progress.. A year or so of hard work at home writing is now beginning to see results…as my books start coming out one by one ..almost off a production line.. – 3 so far and 2 to come out… just at various stages of edit or format)

Pluto squares my natal Uranus – affecting my house of transformation & house of creativity – This means that in general my life was about to go through a major death, rebirth and intense transformation period (am still in the middle of it..!) Power struggles are part of this transit.. as are control, manipulation etc. As it’s a square, it’s about experiencing these and trying to act.  (squares force you into incredible mental gymnastics and expect action.. Compromises are for oppositions, but squares are about taking action to resolve issues).

Saturn in my work & duty sector was opposing natal saturn in my friendship & social sector- This is quite major – half the pain of a saturn-return..more or less..  I expected clashes of authority – mine & others. But it was bigger than just that. It was to affect the way I work, the way I think of duty, service, serving others, as much as the areas of community, friendships, social situations.

Anyone with basic astrology knowledge of houses will agree more or less with these.

Well, in addition to my own calculations, I also purchased Jonathan Cainer’s  3 month personal forecast for myself – and quite a lot of similar conformations, and new elements I had not been aware of. Effectively it is about my midlife crisis – working out where i have been and what matters and where I am going!

All these things have now started to come to pass.

At some future point, I shall tell the whole story  – not now, as am busy with my creative ventures  (even as I write this, my `public history’ is either being erased or re-written by others in positions of authority.

But reading Jonathan Cainer’s forecast for Sagittarius (few days ago) got me amused..

“Mistakes are easy to make. By this, I don’t just mean that they are easy for you to make. They are equally easy for us all to make. The people who think that they are somehow immune to this rule and have mastered the art of error avoidance, are, of course, the most mistaken of all. Let us keep that in mind, this weekend, as you now find yourself compensating for what could be considered as a series of mistaken judgements. What matters, is not what went wrong but what can now be done to make something right.”  (www.Cainer.com)

There are people out there who have judged me as having made all sorts of mistakes. And now the rest of them  are saying, `let it go’. Quite convenient ..for them, if I just did `let go’. ..wouldn’t it?  The biggest mistaken judgement I ever made in the recent decade is trusting so many people, and championing other people’s causes and their organisations.. While I compensate for other people’s group shadow projections on me, I find that my own projections on others have now broken..

I was checking Jonathan Cainer’s forecast for my sign today.. This is what he says.

“We spoke yesterday about moving goalposts and changing rules. It remains true that you are not in a stable situation. Things do keep altering. But you can either let this be a source of enormous irritation or an excuse to start instigating some adjustments of your own. Under the influence of the eclipse, the only question you really have to ask yourself is, are you being fair to the essence or the spirit of an agreement, even if it seems as if nobody is being very true to the letter of the law as it was last laid down?”

This has got me thinking…that close people often complain (in the nicest way) that I keep changing things…Well, my explanations have always been that it’s because factors have changed, people who are committed to ventures with me have changed their levels of commitments or participation etc, and so I’ve had to alter things. In a modern day where everything is going fast at 300mph, how can anyone expect me to stick to my promises, even thought the governing factors are in flux?   Yes, I do get that some things need to be stable, and fixed so that it gives security for others to build on.. BUT I have found myself to be rather tired that it’s me who is expected to remain stable and un-changing, while all else have the freedom (laziness at times) and luxury to weave in and out without firm promises and commitments of their own to me.

So erm, I’ve zapped that rule. Am not obliged to keep any promises I made to anyone (except my marriage vows of course). This i n many ways is Freedom!

The late Maureen Brown – Wiccan High Priestess & professional Psychotherapist – one who taught me 2 years worth of trans-personal psychology & counselling techniques – would be proud!

That reminds me, I must write about her one day 🙂

-Mani Navasothy

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Astrology for Eclipse Magicians (c)MN’12

ps. I have acknowledged Jonathan Cainer’s influence (or rather his forecasts) in my life over the past 2 decades or so..in my book `Astrology for Eclipse Magicians’   You can download a free copy quickly from my Eclipse Magic website   (while Amazon is busy reviewing!)

Psychology & Magic: Know thy Inner-Child

Hi readers, I got to thinking, that for a guy who tags a number of blogs under  Wicca & Witchcraft – and specifically the  psychology, I haven’t really said much on those subjects…and yet, it’s those very realms that my everyday mind is occupied with.    I found this  write-up I had done for one of the modules of the e-Witch Apprentice course.   -Mani

Inner child

We each have an inner-child within us. It is a permanent psychological aspect of each one of us that stays with us forever. The inner child stems from our own childhood days and experiences, and he/ she does not grow! People may think that because it’s a `child’ within us, he/ she is powerless, and harmless. This is true on some level, but not in the way many of us think!

Gaia’s Child (graphics (c)Mani Navasothy 2012

As with any child on this planet, an inner child is powerless  – to fend for him/ herself, and protect him/ herself. But an inner-child is not to be under-estimated as one having no power. On the contrary, our inner-child has more power `over’ us than any other being on the planet! The personality and character of the inner-child can at times over-whelming and all-consuming! The whims and tantrums that our inner-child throws can quite easily take over us and control our actions and emotions.  Effectively, it’s as if the Inner-child is the driver of the adult-person!!

Our needs for security, for love, for warmth, food – and for our mothers  all stem from the Inner-child in us. And so does our need and want for play!  And what’s more, our very creativity stems from the inner-child.

The inner-child does not care about time-tables, schedules, work-loads, deadlines, career progressions, relationships (except one with `The mother’), honour, commitment, altruism or ideals.  He or she just is – pure need,  pure base  emotions, and pure joy!  Eat, drink, sleep & play are his or her only modes, and  the inner-child does not even have self-awareness, or self-identification.  He or she is a pure creature of nature!!

One of the major aspects that govern an inner child is that he/ she – just like any child – has an identity liked and intertwined with the Mother.  When his or her needs are met, he / she is happy and engages in play, and when those needs return, he/ she instinctively wants/ needs and seeks The Mother. And if the mother engages and fulfils those needs  (food, company, warmth, affection), then the Mother is `seen’ as `Good Mother’.  And if the mother does not seem to be fulfilling those needs – when the inner-child wants it (prompt), then the Mother is seen as `bad Mother’.

Mothers can quite quickly go from being `good mother’ to bad mother’ – in seconds, depending on how they did or did not fulfil the inner-child. And of course, if one person is fulfilling the inner-child, then that person – male or female `becomes’ the `good mother’, and elsewhere, another person who did not fulfil the needs of the Inner-child becomes `bad-mother’.

These psychological constructs are projected into our everyday interactions and relationships.  It is not the scope of this brief introduction to go into details, but needless to say,  how we as adults relate to people, leaders, authority figures, lovers, spouses, and even our Gods & Goddesses – are all so intricately tied into the Inner-child.

Knowing `thy self’ is a process, by which, we learn to separate the needs and whims of the inner child away from our `adult’ self, as well as other key considerations (projections, shadows, anima/ animus etc).

In this e-witch Course, we include various practical work and exercises – some of which may seem bizarre and `childish’. However they are not designed for you the adult – and they are aimed at your inner-child!!  For we have learnt through much study, counselling and personal magical experiences – that creativity and true magic flows from the purest of all humans – the child in us!

It is the responsibility of us – the grown-up adults, to become the `good mother’ to our own inner-children, and care, comfort and protect. When those are taken care of, and when we let ourselves play freely, we begin to tap into primal forces of magic!!

(c)Mani Navasothy. 22Feb2012

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Acknowledgement:   Much of these concepts were taught to me by the late Maureen Brown, Counselor & High Priestess of Wicca.  I shall give her due respect in another blog entry.