Category Archives: personal development

Gaslighting: Know It and Identify It to Protect Yourself (psychology)

What’s Gaslighting?  A manipulative tactics employed by  a person, organisation or entity to gain more power!   Here’s a copy of article blog  found, written by Stephanie Sarkis Ph.D. Stephanie Sarkis Ph.D. (link at the bottom).-Mani


Gaslighting is a tactic of behavior in which a person or entity, in order to gain more power, makes a victim question their reality. It works a lot better than you may think. Anyone is susceptible to gaslighting. It is a common technique of abusers, dictators, narcissists, and cult leaders. It is done slowly, so the victim doesn’t realize how much they’ve been brainwashed. In the movie Gaslight (1944), a man manipulates his wife to the point where she thinks she is losing her mind.

People that gaslight use the following techniques:

1. They tell you blatant lies.

You know it’s an outright lie. Yet they are telling you this lie with a straight face. Why are they so blatant? Because they’re setting up a precedent. Once they tell you a huge lie, you’re not sure if anything they say is true. Keeping you unsteady and off-kilter is the goal.

2. They deny they ever said something, even though you have proof.

You know they said they would do something…you know you heard it. But they out and out deny it. It makes you start questioning your reality – maybe they never said that thing. And the more they do this, the more you question your reality and start accepting theirs.

3. They use what is near and dear to you as ammunition.

They know how important your kids are to you, they know how important your identity is to you. So that is one of the first things they attack. If you have kids, they tell you that you did a disservice by having those children. They will tell you that if only you weren’t _____________, you’d be a worthy person. They attack the foundation of your being.

4. They wear you down over time.

This is one of the insidious things about gaslighting – it is done gradually, over time. A lie here, a lie there, a snide comment every so often…and then it starts ramping up. Even the brightest, most self-aware people can be sucked into gaslighting – it is that effective. It’s the “frog in the frying pan” analogy – the heat is turned up slowly, so the frog never realizes what hit it.

5. Their actions do not match their words.

When dealing with a person or entity that gaslights, look at what they are doing rather than what they are saying. What they are saying means nothing. It is just talk. What they are doing is the issue.

6. They throw in positive reinforcement to confuse you.

This person or entity that is cutting you down, telling you that you don’t have value – is now praising you for something you did. This adds an additional sense of uneasiness. You think, “Well maybe they aren’t so bad.” Yes, they are. This is a calculated attempt to keep you off-kilter – and again, question your reality. Also look at what you were praised for – it is probably something that served the gaslighter.

7. They know confusion weakens people.

Gaslighters know that all people like having a sense of stability and normalcy. Their goal is to uproot this and make you constantly question everything. And humans’ natural tendency is to look to the person or entity that will help you feel more stable – and that happens to be the gaslighter.

8. They project.

They are a drug user or a cheater – yet they are constantly accusing you of that. This is done so repetitively that you start trying to defend yourself – and are distracted from the gaslighter’s own behavior.

9. They try to align people against you.

Gaslighters are masters at manipulating and finding the people they know will stand by them no matter what – and they use these people against you. They will make comments such as “____________ knows that you’re not right”, or “___________ knows you’re useless too”. Keep in mind it does not mean that these people actually said these things. The gaslighter is a constant liar. When the gaslighter uses this tactic it makes you feel like you don’t know who to trust or turn to – and that leads you right back to the gaslighter. And that’s exactly what the want. Isolation gives them more control.

10. They tell you or others that you are crazy.

This is one of the most effective tools of the gaslighter – because it’s dismissive. The gaslighter knows if they question your sanity, people will not believe you when you tell them the gaslighter is abusive or out-of-control. It’s a master technique.

11. They tell you everyone else is a liar.

By telling you that everyone else (your family, the media) is a liar, it again makes you question your reality. You’ve never known someone with the audacity to do this, so they must be right, right? No. It’s a manipulation technique. It makes people turn more to the gaslighter for the “correct” information – which isn’t correct information at all.

The more you are aware of these techniques, the quicker you can identify them before you fall into the gaslighter’s trap.

Copyright 2017 Sarkis Media.   http://www.stephaniesarkis.com


article taken from https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/here-there-and-everywhere/201701/gaslighting-know-it-and-identify-it-protect-yourself


 

 

Serpent Power – Magical Workshops coming soon! (London)

Okay..I can’t contain this excitement so am going to just blurt it.. Melanie Philippides and I have been planning a set of rather powerful workshops involving.. ( take a deep breath).. snakes! Pythons in fact. She has 2.. and is looking after a 3rd one.. one of them is very large indeed..(twice as big as this one in photo).. whom I met yesterday evening.. for ..shall we say, `getting attuned’ before working on the details of workshops..!) 🙂

Mani & Melanie serpent power workshops coming soon .jpg

I met Melanie first at the Birthday of Goddess Isis ritual by Cleopatra’s Needle, Embankment, in 2013.. but lost touch for a few years but was facebook friends. The photo below was taken at one of Melanie’s snake / fusion Belly dance performance in a venue in Croydon last October’15 where I met her again (and Shiva). We seem to have all that Game of Throne, snakes & Dragons magical explorations in common..and the result now of course are these magical joint workshops..

watch out for full details in a few days..  and then ..book fast…as spaces will be limited!

Bright Blessings

-Mani Navasothy

ReBoot your mind (Astrology – Mercury trines Pluto – twice over retro/direct motions)

Reboot your mind with power of Mercury & Pluto:
 
Folks..there is a marvelous astrological opportunity coming up! In particular, a powerful Mercury-trine-Pluto aspect. What is brilliant is, as Mercury is currently retrograding, it forms this aspect..once..then starts to go direct..so forms the aspect again the next day!
reboot-your-mind-mercury-trine-pluto
 
here are the dates/ times (Brit.Summer Time):
 
1. Mercury (retro) – Trine- Pluto : wednesday 21st sept (2:26am)
2. Mercury direct – Thursday 22nd sept (6.30am)
3. Mercury (direct)- trine-Pluto : Friday 23rd Sept ( 9.51am)
 
As many know, Mercury is a planet that rules Gemini & Virgo, influences the mind & thinking, contracts, obligations, communications, siblings. It is the planet closest to the Sun.
 
Pluto is a planet that is furthest from the Sun, rules Scorpio, influences death & rebirth, transformations, sex, power, control, emotions and probing for deeper truths.
 
So..read this again…and let what strikes out in your mind/ intuition surface.. and focus on it.. And then get to the work..
 
You get 3 magical moments to do this work!
 
Bright Stellar Blessings
Mani Novalight
 
http://www.QuantumPhoenix.net for astrology, esoterica and magical blogs!

Wiccan Apprentice Course (woodland based, in 3 parts) – starts 4th sept16 – Wimbledon

Many in my meetup group have asked for a deeper, extended covering of Wicca, so here it is – a course in 3 parts. It is still suitable for beginners, but each subject is covered in much greater depths, and includes meditations, pathworking, and magical / ritual work – to embed what you are learning!

This takes place over 3 consecutive Sundays in September. You don’t have to do all of them.. (but if you did, it will form a cohesive deeper and practical experience of Wicca). You may attend one or more.

• Part 1: Sacred Space & Energy (Sunday 4th Sept)

• Part2: Horned Gods & Moon Goddesses (sunday 11th Sept).

• Part 3: Practical Magic, Covens & Initiations in Wicca (Sunday 18th Sept)

Fee: £13 per session. You can book/ rsvp now for each course, and turn up and pay by cash on the day.

The following structure has been devised by me.


wiccan apprentice 1 of 3 (c) Mani Navasothy

Part 1:   Sacred Space & Energy –   (Sunday 4th September 2016)

You’ll experientially learn about the following :

Magical energy preparations/ work:

• Chakra system of personal energy centres will be explained, with a practical meditation to experience this;

• An energy attuning pathworking will be led by tutor (using 4 element imagery, as well as growing horns & branches, and connecting to the Earth centres using imagery of growing roots.

• Consecrations – you’ll first see a demonstration of  purifying and blessing, using Salt & Water,  incense and Candle / lantern,  the tools to use, and the usual wiccan words; Then each student will get a chance to practise the consecrations;

• Circle casting:   Using your own wand, athame or the tutor’s wand,  you will earn the visualisation, energy work and practise casting a magic circle.

• Elements & Quarters:     The reasons and methods of calling/ invoking the undertaken elementals at the quarters inside a magic circle will be explained and demonstrated with words and symbols(invoking pentagrams, and element triangles) to be drawn;  You will then practise this;

• Transpersonal qualities:   There will be further explanations of the qualities invoked with elements, colour and symbolic correspondences.  An exercise will also be  undertaken by us – for internal elemental exploration and transpersonal balance.

• Witches Rune:   Often used in Circles for energy raising (creative poetry written by Doreen Valiente – mother of modern Witchcraft).   We will allocate some time to exploring the Witche’s Rune, the symbolism inherent in it, and have several practice chants of it.


wiccan apprentice 2 of 3 (c) Mani Navasothy

Part 2:   Working with God & Goddess in Wicca:   (Sunday 11th September 2016)

You’ll experientially learn about the following :

• God forms in Wicca:   This includes Cernunnos, Hern, Pan, Green Man, Dark Lord (Death), Sun God, Odin, Osiris …amongst others.   The symbology of Horns, hooves, antlers are explained, as well as some discussion on the demonising (Pagan god seen as satan/ devil) of the god by non-pagans. We’ll deal with any hidden fears, old conditionings and prejudices, and work transpersonally to reconnect with the Horned God of Wicca and his empowering wildwood energies. Chants will be taught and used.

• Goddess form in Wicca:   We’ll explore the Triple-Goddess imagery used in Wicca- maiden, mother and crone, as well as the various examples – Dianna the Huntress, Isis , Cailleach, Hecate, Gaia and more…

• The God & Goddess cycle in Wicca explained with diagrams and notes- ie the maiden Persephone’s abduction at Autumn,  motherhood, rejuvenated Bride arriving back to land at Imbolc;  Marriage of God & Goddess at Beltane;  the sacrifice of the God at Lammas; coming of Dark Lord at Samhain; Birth of Sun-child at Yule and more.

• Invocations, evocations and Charges of God & Goddess :  What happens after circle is cast and energy raised in a coven?   How are the god & Goddess brought into the Circle?  Who carries those energies?  What is the Drawing down of the Moon?   And Sun?  How does working with God & Goddess empower Witches?   All will be explained with brief demonstration of postures.

• We’ll go through some invocations and learn to use them.  (which you can use in your own or group rituals).

• Charge of the Goddess – the poetry work created by Doreen Valiente – mother of modern witchcraft will be looked.

• Cup and sword pathworking – to meet the God and Goddess.


wiccan apprentice 3 of 3 (c) Mani Navasothy

Part 3:   Ritual Magic, Covens & Initiations in Wicca   (Sunday 18th September 2016)

You’ll experientially learn about the following :

• Principles of Magic & Divination explained using the hexagram;

• Main forms of ritual magic practised in coven-wicca explained and demonstrated (Candle magic, cord magic, healing work, rune magic).

• We’ll do one piece of practical magic.

• Making of tools and how to consecrate them in a circle will be covered, with an option for you to consecrate one of your tools (wand);

• Coven structures,  initiation degree systems; some preparations and quests that seekers of initiation must undergo (no oathbound coven secrets will be divulged! But published materials will be talked about, and any misconceptions/ fears you have will be addressed as long as it does not breach wiccan secrecy oaths.

• All about your Witch-Name :  What is it? Why?  How do you go about choosing one?  When is it used? and more.


What to bring

• For your own comfort, please bring any food/drinks lunch (Please avoid eating during course delivery, unless otherwise stated on the day !);

• bring flask of hot drinks.

• ***Bring comfortable cushion/ mat to sit on, as well as a blanket / throw to wrap up ..during meditative work (or if it’s just cold).

• Please wear warm coats, socks (those ankle socks are pointless…as gnats and mosquitos will get you !), scarf..

• We’ll have some wine for ceremonial parts of the course & for a bit of social after

• Strictly no exotic substance/ drugs etc!

• Note books/ pen .


Recording / photography policy

No private recording by phones/ dictaphones.

No photography during course delivery & practise. .


Course notes / voice recording  by Tutor:

Some printed notes will be provided

Parts of the Course will be recorded (voice only) by the Tutor, and uploaded to a private link, where students who attended the course can listen in a few weeks after the course to refresh their minds.  (only informative parts. Pathworking etc will not be part of this.


Practical Details for the Day (venue/transport).

Public transport:

You can get to Wimbledon (served by Train, buses, tram, tube).

From Wimbledon, take bus 93 going towards Putney.

Get down at `Wimbledon Tea rooms’ stop

Walk 5-10 minutes along a small road to Wimbledon Tea Rooms, inside Wimbledon Common.

By Car:

You can drive in and park your cars for free.

Meeting point:

Please gather at the outdoor seats of the Tea Room/ Cafe by 11.30am.   Once all are gathered, we’ll all walk up into the space set up for the course (close to where we held the course in February & July’ 16).

End time:

We will break for lunch and short tea/coffee breaks. And we shall aim to finish by 5pm..


Links to the Meetup events for these courses (where you can pay by paypal)

• Part 1:   Sacred Space & Energy  (Sunday 4th Sept)

 Part2:   Horned Gods & Moon Goddesses  (sunday 11th Sept).

• Part 3:  Practical Magic, Covens & Initiations in Wicca  (Sunday 18th Sept)

Bright Blessings
-Mani Navasothy
( Wiccan High  Priest & published Author)

In deeds may we be noble once more! (Solar oath)

In deeds may we be noble once more…! ( A Solar Oath):

Good morning all.. There is so much positive, creative, wonderful, affectionate, loving, kind, generous, divine things to be thinking about and doing in the world.. 🙂

Yes there are worries.. :-/ and sadly human nature is such that…there is a compulsion and need to want to talk about it. Simmer and fester..and chase our own tails..! 😦 (That’s actually not human nature.. It’s a wounded Inner-child behaviour).

One of the key magical principles.. – even by all that airy fairy quantum probability/ observer/ collapse wave function thingy! – is that what we think and pour energy into starts to manifest…!!

So make it a good thought eh? 🙂 Have a great day! 🙂

Am posting a part of the Solar-prayer/ invocation I wrote/ used at a recent Midsummer ritual:

“Great One of Heaven, Powers of the Sun
We worship thee in thy ancient names
Sooriya, Sol, Lugh, Ra and Horus
Rise up in our skies.. and illuminate our lands
….
….
Bring us clear Visions.
Illuminate our souls.
Set free all spirits that seek liberation.
In our dreams, may we soar to new heights.
And in deeds may we be Noble once more.
May our hearts be full of honour.
And may we forever shine in your splendour.”

-Mani Navasothy

Introduction to Wicca- One day Course for Beginners in London (woodland based)

Join me in this one-day outdoor course, suitable for beginners & seekers of Wicca!

As a nature-based religion, the best way to explore Wicca is in a natural setting! So I have run these since 2006 in various woods & pars of London. Yes at times it’s cold or it rains… but we prepare (that too is part of being a Nature-Witch!)

Who is this course for?

This course is  to introduce Wicca & Witchcraft to beginners & seekers!  I often see so many people stumbling or making some mistakes or are nervous at rituals- so here it is – a full introduction.  This is for any and all those interested or curious about Wicca & Witchcraft and like  a simple, down to earth, friendly introduction…the whole lot in one half a day..!

Who is this course NOT for?  If you are already initiated or fully aware of wicca and been in other training groups for many years / months, then this is NOT for you.   Those interested in Advanced Wicca can join me for other courses in summer!

Course contents:

• Origins of Modern Wicca  (notes given.  Brief verbal outline)

• Wiccan Law & principles (notes given.  Brief verbal outline)

• Altar setup & Wiccan Ritual tools

• Consecrations, sacred space & magic circle

• Working with Elements & Quarters

• Horned God & Moon Goddess

•  Magic & Spellcraft in Wicca

• Wheel of the year – related seasonal myths & rituals explained

• Initiations & Coven life – brief outline

Fee:  £27 (per person).   

To book for this please visit the meetup event    Meetup event- Complete Wicca : A One day woodland course in London

**Concessions available. Please message me for detail.   

**You must pay in advance to confirm a space.  

**Cancellations must be done 24 hrs prior or no refunds will be given**.   

What to bring

• For your own comfort, please bring any food/drinks lunch (Please avoid eating during course delivery!);

• bring flask of hot drinks.

• ***Bring comfortable cushion/ mat to sit on, as well as a blanket / throw to wrap up ..during meditative work (or if it’s just cold).

• Please wear warm coats, socks (those ankle socks are pointless!), scarf..  ***(I say this every time, and 1-2 people still attend with unprepared attire and shiver at our events,.  It is uncomfortable to look at and distracts others.  So please heed this advise.  Thanks. )**

• We’ll have some wine for ceremonial parts of the course & for a bit of social after/

• Strictly no exotic substance/ drugs etc!

• Note books/ pen   (printed notes will be provided).

Recording / photography policy

No private recording by phones/ dictaphones.

No photography during course delivery & practise. .

Practical Details for the Day (venue/transport).

Course space will be set-up in advance by Organiser

You may bring packed lunch or buy at nearby Cafe (affordable cakes/food & coffee etc ).

You can arrive by public transport (train to Wimbledon, then a quick bus trip of 10 mins..and a gentle walk of 10 mins to the meeting spot)..or drive in and park your cars for free.

Once all are gathered, we’ll all walk up into the space set up for the course (close to where we held the course in February 16).

Please gather from 11.00am by the outside seats at Windmill Tea room.   we’ll get walking into the woods.

We will break for lunch and short tea/coffee breaks. And we shall aim to finish by 6pm..

To book for this and/ or keep up to date with info, please visit the meetup event page for this.    Meetup event- Complete Wicca : A One day woodland course in London

Bright Blessings
-Mani Navasothy
(Gardnerian Wiccan High  Priest)

 

Sleeping in Light – 9 months of camping in garden

Back in August 2015, I began `sleeping in the garden’ for a few days – that extended to few weeks..It was okay because it was summer time..
But then a quest began.. I decided to stay a bit longer and enjoy being connected to nature, mark the cycles, be invaded by foxes, feel storms and rains shake my tent and so on..

Then I thought let’s test myself by being out there for Winter…and it worried me (am the weakling-guy who used to get sick all the time if i got wet or had a small injury)..

Now..well, winter has come and gone.. ! While mother Earth held me and sister willow watched over me, the elements have torn me and stripped me to the bone and soul, and re-built me.

Am constantly aware of the plights of homeless people in streets.. and surely will do something soon about it..

Summer is almost here.. along with a new threat …pollens.. and I’ve become `used’ to being out.. Used to getting, coming into the house, wash and go about my life.but at night finish up.. go into garden..see clear skies, planets (Jupiter is there every night).. see the moon wax..wane and wax again.. and go into my tent…set up candles (around tent) and inside.. put on my chanting music in earphones..wrap up and fall asleep..with gods and magical things in mind!

Slepeing in light- 9 months in garden (c) Mani Navasothy 2016

Yes there have been ups and downs.. moments of solitudes turning to loneliness..but that’s no so much a physical but a mental thing or one of the heart..

This has been quite an empowering thing.. grounding..connecting to nature.. going deeply within to face my own darkness and shadows, tuning into my own energies & power, finding more humility but also becoming more assertive & confident in a quiet way. I have nothing to prove..Am alive..and there are wonderful people in my life.. so many new people and things have entered my life…and much of the old has been reviewed, healed and transformed.. ..and life’s mysteries (and my-Story) is still unfolding..

There is so much to say about all the insights, learnings, ideas, thoughts and revelations that are flooding my hear & mind..  The work is ongoing (for now).  And I’ll share more of it over the coming weeks and months..

Bright Earthly Blessings
-Mani Navasothy

(Gardnerian Wiccan High Priest  & Shamanic Practitioner)

Moral Compass & Magic

Moral compass & Magic (pt1):
A friend was asking others about this.. Made me think.. and here’s my radical thoughts (`thought in progress’..I’ll come back to this later):

magic and moral compass

1. Magic..for those who work it..should be everyday stuff .. not something to use until till some pivotal, crisis or noble cause strikes. If you know it, use it as you would use your hand, legs, mind, heart, eyes!

2. Anyone on the planet can learn / practise magic.. So it’s not an exclusive `advantage’ or responsibility resting in the hands of some elite or select bunch of Gurus and Wizards. All can have access to it..

3. As for moral compass.. that’s just too cerebral.. way too many laws and rules.. made up by those ahead of us or gone before.. just disempowering, holier-than-thou, scaremongering-crap..

No moral compass is needed! `Do what thou Will’..full stop!

In wicca, there’s the `rule’  – `An it harm none, do what you will’.   Well, if we take magic as something that is possible (albeit, with some training & development for some..and more natural for others),  then it ceases to be a special case that requires special rules. The `an it harm none..’ applies to *anything* we do in life with any thing we have- … hands, gun, swords, words.  We should strive not to hurt or harm anyone or anything (an impossibility in itself..but that’s another debate).  

As I said, my radical thoughts.

Bright Blessings.
-Mani Navasothy

Be Brave of the Warrior within

Be Brave of the Warrior within  – Empowerment poetry by Mani Navasothy

Be Brave of the warrior within (c) Mani Navasothy 2016

Be Brave of the Warrior within

There is much in this crazy world that needs and deserves
the protection of the Warrior within.
It is a fire to be embraced,
not feared and banished or oppressed
out of shame,
Or a desire for the path of love.

Even Love..
even light
even peace
needs the protection..
of the sword and the staff at times
From those who would see it destroyed,
those who have their black hearts set on murder and mayhem
Death and destruction of love and light.
and in the face of such demons,
flowers and kisses stand no chance
Only tooth and claw can rise
and face such vicious oppressions

Only the Tiger in our eyes
Only the wolf in our arms
Only the bear within our bellies
can make a difference
in those moments of battle of breaking ideals and bones
Moments that pierce and want to scratch out our souls.

You speak of leading the wolves
and seek its company
Was it for its smile and a tender lick of the tongue
upon your face?
or the power and perseverance of its jaws?

You seek the company of Lions
Is it for the beauty of its beating heart
and the majesty of his mane
or the sharpness of his claws?

You peek at mother-bear in the forest
Is it for her style of walking
and the seeking of salmon
or the awesome strength of her body?

By all means, fly like an Eagle
sore to spiritual heights
Shout, hoot and see wisdom in the dark
like an Owl
But remember.
And please do remember..
The Owl and the Eagle..
They dismember their food so viciously too
They do tear out the flesh of little rodents,
and swallow whole the bleeding hearts of small birds!

There is a Warrior in all of us..
It is in..
..The fire that protects us
..The bone that stands us
..the muscle that moves us
There is a Warrior in all of us..
one that needs embracing..
One that stands with us..
Yes, even us..who are on a path of love!

(c) Mani Navasothy 2016

25th feb’16

Snow spiral & the Coming of Bride

We are at that pause..the point between Yule and Imbolc..

Amazing how just in the course of even one day our moods can change.. forming, merging, dividing, re-merging, emerging, undulating.. What turbulence our hearts make.. while the mind watches it all.. We are now about a week into the Mercury-retrograde.. Things will unravel.. and would seem like chaos.. the more one tries to pin down reality, more it will slip away.. And it is exactly at these times, that  you must  hold dear your faith in the Stars..and Fates..

..and  that all will be well!

In a few weeks, the Goddess Bride shall arise from her wintery place of mysteries, and walk into our lives again.. her path illuminated by a hundred points of light.

And she’ll bring with her the 3 gifts – the flames of inspiration, purification and that of healing..

Poetry, creativity and hope will abound…

..and the anguish of the artists, the pangs of the lovers and longings of the lost shall be fulfilled.. !

Bright Blessings

-Mani Navasothy

Snow spiral & coming of Bride (c) Mani Navasothy 2016.jpg
Snow Spiral & The coming of Bride   – photo & art (c) Mani Navasothy 2010 / 2016.