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Blink of the Cosmic Eye
(aka Imbolc Thoughts on Death and Loss)

When I was young, the thought of anyone near and dear to me passing ..terrified and broke my heart. But over the decades, as I see many pillars fall (I wrote a poem on that back in 1992), I realise life has been training us to cope with death..

I was 5 ofcourse when I saw my grandfather pass right infront of my eyes. I cried because I saw my father cry for the first time.

So here at almost 55 solar cycles later, my own tears have dried up when news comes of a dear one passing, or being at Death’s door (both are happening right now ..today).

Is it a case that the heart has hardened and become desensitized to pain and loss?

No.. Only few months ago, some of us suffered a most terrible loss – of not one but 3… all at ones, and on my birthday! And I am still l embroiled in that. To loose such young things is devastating and cripling.

No the heart has not hardened to loss.
Rather it has learnt that death is coming for us all and it accepts it. Mine does anyway.. And the kindness of loved ones gone and passing remains as sentiments and cherished memory..

But the urgeny of our own fading lives takes focus… what time we have left, and what purpose we haved served, and what purpose life has all in all? These things run like background noise in our hearts and minds…

What quietly takes centre-stage is the everyday living.. the small moments.. And finally we beging to do that which gurus tell us to do oall our lives.. We stop living in the past, and stop fearing the future.. and we beging to live in the here and now.. the presence.

10 years ago I started to live as if each day is my last.. Loss and depressions may have brought me to that way, but it has become the way..

Many people are still caught in empire-building modes.. Powering, plodding, plotting, prodding, poking, and pissing on others’ parades!

Me? I wake up.. get as mch as I am pleased to do, make some gentle plans, and go to sleep as if I’ll not wake up the next day. But I am glad I do wake up the next day.. This is how it has been for 10 years.. That’s 1 fifth of my life. And its long enough that this mind-set has settled. (Don’t get me wrong, anyone who crosess my path in the most acrimonious way stands the risk of my full wrath.. it comes when i deem it ..!)

So While I hope for happier better futures, it’s the now that I am at.. I work to free myself from obligations and the machinations of others and their projections and expectations..

I would urge you do the same!

As I write this, friends are attending a Wiccan Elder’s funeral. And relatives are rushing to see an uncle in Hospital.. Friends and family members ask me ..as they are torn.. should they go or not. And my answer to them all is …freedom!

The dead remain dead. And the dying will die. You can not change either of them.

But you can give your selves freedom! As I do for me! Let the flames of purification and healing burn ..and let the flames of creativity consume you… as I do.

The Universe began in a ball of flame .. or so science tells us. Marvel at it.. And space and time and reality may all end in a dark cosmic crunch. It won’t matter. you and I’ll be gone before that.

In the larger scale of things, a whole galaxy forming, living and dying is a blink of an eye for the Universe.. Our lives.. not even a trillionth of that blink.

Stellar Blessings
Mani

1st feb 2024
London, UK